Thankless jobs: janitors, garbage men, hookers, and reporting on Sumo & Stogies. I had a rough work week and really wanted to go to the bar tonite and toss back a few relaxed pints with some buddies. However, S&S is a cruel mistress. I got home from work at 10:00 and i’ve got this report plus our betting sheets for tomorrow, plus 2 work reports to get wrapped up, and I got a 9:00 call tomorrow morning. So I apologize if I didn’t cover every facet of every bout. If you want to blame someone, blame Daly, Valentine, Briton-Meyer, Chalmers, and Montana for having families.
That aside we go in to today with a slightly interesting situation developing. Kise is at 10-2. Hakuho and Harumafuji are at 12-0. Kise has got Haruma today, and Hakuho tomorrow. If he beats Haruma today, and Hakuho wins, then Kise beats Hakuho tomorrow, and Haruma wins tomorrow, they will be tied going into senshuraku. Which is good for tension. However, if Haruma loses today and tomorrow, and Hakuho wins both, then Hakuho gets his 29th yusho. Conversely if Hakuho loses to Kakuryu and Kise and Haruma beats both of them, then Harry will get his 6th yusho. We’ll see how it goes. Continue reading
Welcome one and all to Day 12 of the Kyushu Tournament. Goldstein reporting to you live from my couch. I’m going to take a note from my people’s playbook and interpret something ex nihilo. You know, 12 is a very auspicious number. There were 12 ancient tribes of Israel, 12 disciples of Jesus, and 12 days of Christmas. We have 12 months in a year, and days are cut into two sets of 12 hours. Hours and minutes are calculated in pentanomials of 12. 12 people sit on a jury in the American legal system. There are 12 signs of the zodiac (Western and Chinese); Shakespeare wrote Twelfth Night; Odin had 12 sons; there were 12 principal gods in the Greek pantheon; Shia Islam recognizes 12 Imams; Joe Namath wore the number 12, as did Jim Kelly; there are 12 function keys on your keyboard; they come Cheaper by the Dozen; there were 12 Angry Men; and I have wasted 12 minutes on this. Continue reading
It’s good weather for ducks here in Akita. If you happen to be a duck however, I recommend steering clear for the time being though.
E-M13 Yoshikaze (4-6) vs W-M7 Endo (4-6)
Coming off a fine win from yesterday the crowd favourite Endo, against de Gama favourite Yoshikaze. Yoshikaze started fast with some nice tsuppari. But Endo got a left hand grip quite quickly and kept him in close. When Endo got the right hand shallow grip Yoshi tried to break Endo’s right grip, but failed, and then tried to break the left grip which only set himself up for a yorikiri loss.
Goldstein is back picking up another day of gut-jiggling action. Is it just me, or does this tournament feel… somewhat mellow? The question of whether Kotooshuucream will be demoted or not has been solved. Will Endou perform alright at his new rank? Eh, kinda. Can Oosunaarashi handle makuuchi? Eh, kinda. Will Goueidou make an ozeki run? Eh, kinda. Will this be the tournament when Kisenosato gets his act together? Nope. Even Harumafuji isn’t giving us anything to grumble about. People are injured; the juryo boys have come to visit; the yokozunas are leading. It’s just kind of… comfortable, like a warm fireplace that won’t ever burn your house down or fill it with black smoke. No, I’m not going anywhere with this, shut up. Continue reading
I’m back again for day 9. I think I might be a little bit cursed. I just realized that for as many basho as I can remember in recent years I have picked the one or two of the guys that go kyujo for my fantasy sumo team. Kotoyuki seemed like a lock. I picked Yoshikaze last time for shits and giggles, and he was out for a fractured wrist. In Nagoya it was Chiyonokuni. In Natsu I had picked Baruto (that was the final injury that brought on his retirement), Haru was Chiyotairyu, and the list goes on. I feel like maybe I should stop picking riksihi I like, and just pick guys like Tamaasuka, or Goeido, or Tenkaiho, or Goeido. Anyway, I’ll leave the metaphysical ponderings on such twoddle to Connolly, and get on with the report. Continue reading
Back from the grave thriller style though I know its not quite the right month, its everybody’s favorite spicy piece of filth: de Gama! Sky rockets are in flight today as I am about to serve you some Afternoon Delight. Its what I do… do you want a scone and some tea. That’s right you do, you old bird. Why don’t you just take this sausage [roll] and this god damn Americano. Anyways I digress, I started off this morning feeling so polite until after I showered where I continued to rub sticks and stones together until the sparks ignite. I would say that the thought of rubbing you is getting me so excited, however to be perfectly fair we all know the only person I thought of rubbing was in fact myself. So without further ado lemme get that chili oil because this rubbing is about to get real spicy!
Day 7 of Kyushu and I feel like we are in Nagoya. There has been so much talk of a slippery dohyo being thrown around. However, there might be some merit to it. There were quite a few hatakikomis, and even more attempts. The English side of the broadcast had my new favorite color commentator, John Gunning. I’m not just saying this because he’s buddies with Connolly. Genuinely he’s one of the few that both knows his stuff and isn’t insufferable. He needs to work a bit on his comedic material though. Take a cue from us, man… dick and fart jokes. They make the world go ’round. Now onto action for day 7.