May Technical Examination Basho: Day 12

Looks like its that time again…. Sumo….Day 12

Its only me this time since the last joint effort ended with Bertrum and I jiggling for five days straight before getting in the second part of the 5th/6th day venture.  Well I guess we’ll see how this one turns out.  But, I am happy to say that I am prepared for this day’s sumo (however short/long it may end up being) …. I got my whiskey and my smokes..

Takamisakari vs. Akiseyama: Taka up to his normal antics riling up the crowd, maybe this time he’ll pull something off.  He it seems the Aomorian did it.  He went in for the hug, got a better grip on that ass and finally strained himself to yorikiri Aki out the ring.  This may be one of the only times I remember reporting a win for Robocop..

Daido vs. Tochinonada: Was it just me or was it a little sloppy?  They rush at each other and Tochinonada pulls the weakest henka I’ve ever seen.  Note to self; Make sure you are fast enough before you try it buddy.  I mean granted Tochi almost gets him but after some time in the middle hugging it out.  Daido comes around for the victory.

Tosayutaka vs. Toyohibiki: I wasn’t going to comment on this one but whatever it was a bit interesting.  Toyo lunges forward locking into Tosa.  One of them thinks hes a prepubescent girl and decides to rock a cartwheel while locked onto his opponent.  The result is a suicidal hope that you don’t land first… Toyo lands first, and the schoolyard win goes to Tosa.

Gagamaru vs. Asasekiryu:  Lady Gaga looking good this bout.  Almost reminiscent of Baruto style strength.  The lady goes into the tachiai looking for the mawashi grab and once hes got it.  Gaga pulls up and thrusts those hips like a two year old male dog smelling a bitch during mating season.  I used the term right… trust me
Gaga wins..

Tokitenku vs. Shotenro; Wow. Shotenro is not doing hot.  He got completely owned…not only was he completely lift up off the ground with his legs flailing like a little girl but he gets immediately leg swiped  jiggling down to the ground.  Props to Toki.

Tamawashi vs. Miyabiyama: Miyabiyama started with E. Honda style slapped showing around around why he is one of the contenders for the booby prize. After a bit of that he takes the poor chap down.

Kyokutenho vs. Takekaze: For the Mountains of Shirakami to the massive giant that is Chokai the divine wind of Akita has never failed to disappoint me each time I report alone.  Both rushed in a tachiai and Kyoku locked the Akitian’s arms in.  Kyoku thrusted a few times and the Brothers Kaze racks loss number one.

Yoshikaze vs. Aminishiki: Oh, Yoshi…I would have hoped you could do better at M7.  This is usually where you shine, buddy.  Its not like you are doing bad but come on just try to remember what you did a few bashos back.  Maybe soak yourself in the beautiful onsens of Oita and scale some of those mountains near Miyazaki in Ume-machi. Lets just say Yoshi tried to pull the suicidal cart wheel but the Sneek had his number.  I wouldn’t be surprised if Yoshi got an injury on his back.  Like I said buddy an onsen will sort that out.  Loss number two for the Brothers Kaze.

Goeido vs. Kaisei:  Both went in for the bear hug.  Maybe because Kaisei got all that hair to grab onto Goeido take him down for his second loss.

Kakuryu vs. Tochinoshin: Henka. Fishy gets the win

Okinoumi vs. Kisenosato: They both come in for a decent tachiai.  But instead of automatically going in for the bear hug there is a bit of slapping arms away in order to attain the desired grip.  Both failing to do so they engage in the hug formation.  Kise then tries to semi cartwheel the guy and fails.  However because of the imbalance Kise then proceeds to hip thrust to victory.

Baruto vs. Kaio: Kaio cowardly henka to try and win but Baruto doesn’t even get phased.  Baruto quickly grabs that mawashi. However Kaio seems to almost off-balance Baruto to the edge of the ring.  For a split second Kaio seems to have it but Baruto forces Kaio toward the center of the ring. This makes Kaio visibly tired. Now, its time to do what Baruto does best: grab that mawashi, lift up, and force the opponent out of the ring.

Kotoshogiku vs. Harumafuji: Henka. Koto falls flat on his face.

Hakuho vs. Aran: Hakuho starts off with the slaps until Aran gets a hold of the mawashi.  Aran tries a few thrusts but no go.  Hakuho keeps his cool demeanor and wait for that grip. Aran then tries something again and fail giving Hakuho the chance to flip him around near the edge of the ring. They seem to be at a stalemate…neither of them can overpower the other.  Finally Aran tries to start a cartwheel maneuver and Hakuho swings him to the ground.

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