The Johnson/Simmons Exchange of the Day
[While watching a spirited yotsu-bout on the bales]
Doreen Simmons: “Yes, yes! No! Yes, yes!…No—yes, yes, YES!!
Murray Johnson: “That reminds me of a movie I saw one time, but we won’t get into that.”
Greetings, and Happy New Year my friends! I was just lighting up a MonteCristo Petit Tubos smoke with my day of sumo enjoyment when the news popped up on the screen. The greatest of yokozuna, Taiho, had passed in a Tokyo hospital at the age of 72. Somehow, this news loomed darkly over the events in today’s Makuuchi division. It was a bit more difficult for the rikishi, and me to concentrate.
At any rate, I’ll hold off on the In Memoriam: Taiho for another post and focus on the bouts of interest today.
To start things out, Osunaarashi is kicking some infidel ass in his shin-Makushita basho. Today was Boody’s fourth bout, which he won with an easy yorikiri against Fuugibusashitto. He improves to 4-0 and earns his KK.
J12E Takamisakari (3-3) vs. J8W Homarefuji (3-3): nine years difference between these two Aomori beauts. Homer hit the tachiai hard and busted into Ringo’s apple core, gaining a right-inside and finishing him off with a shove-out. Takamisakari falls to 3-4 and teeters on the edge of his career. Homarefuji improves to 4-3 as if anyone but his mother cares.
M16E Miyabiyama (0-6) vs. M9W Takekaze (1-5): Head-to-head is 9-8 in McFlubby’s favor. Tachiai, and McFlubby thrusts and Takekaze pulls. The Akita squirt gave up on the pull down, and with an easy two-hand thrust he turned McFlubby around and sent him packing with a rear push-out win. Miyabiyama falls to 0-7 and is one loss away from saying “sayonara” to Makuuchi. Takekaze improves to 2-5.
KE Tochiozan (3-3) vs. SW Baruto (3-3): head-to-head is 14-1 in Bart’s favor. From the tachiai, Bart got squared up nicely with his hands on O’s teats, and marched on forward. A clear push out win by the struggling Estonian, who improves to 4-3. Tochiozan falls to 3-4.
The over-hyped rikishi battle: today we got OE Kisenosato (4-2) against the flavor of the month, SE Goeido (4-2). They’re calling Goeido “the giant killer” since he’s beaten up on a group of underachieving ozekis, but he’s also lost to M2 Toyonosquirt and yesterday, his rival KE TochiOh-shit! Kissy leads the head-to-head 11-4, and today…Kissy had some enthusiasm in this one. It was a rare showing of spirit from this ozeki. Kissy started with a bitch-slap, then a shoulder drive, and Goat-weed was moving back and off balance enough for Kissy to pull him down. Goat-weed slipped and his winning streak over ozeki came to an end. Kisenosato improves to 5-2 while Goeido falls to 4-3 in his ‘ozeki run.’
The pimpin’ KW Shohozan (1-5) showed off his bling-bling against OW Kotoshogiku (4-2), though the Geek leads the head-to-head 3-0. Shoho won the tachiai and drove well on the Geek, but the Geek went lateral and got out of it. Geek got it together and drove on Shoho. Near the bales, Shoho attempted in desperation a sweet amiuchi (toss of the fisherman’s net) which brought the Geek to the ground before Shoho stepped out. They later changed the kimarite to a boring underarm throw, but “toss of the fisherman’s net” sound so damn awesome! Shohozan improves to 2-5 while Kotoshogiku falls to 4-3.
OE Kotooshu (3-3) vs. M4E Gagamaru (2-4): the Eurozeki was slow at the tachiai, but so was Butterball. They locked up and with a solid right-hand inside, the Eurozeki did an easy pulling underarm throw. Kotooshu improves to 4-3 while Gagamaru falls to 2-5.
M3W Kaisei (4-2) vs. YW Harumafuji (6-0): head-to-head is 4-0 in the Yokozuna’s favor. Good tachiai with a throat attack by Haruma which turned the Brazilian off center. With a deep reach and pull on the back of Kaisei’s belt, the Brazilian was turned all around and Haruma led him out with a rear push-out win. The Yokozuna stays in the lead with a 7-0 while Kaisei falls to 4-3.
YE Hakuho (5-1) vs. M3E Toyohibiki (0-6): head-to-head tied at one a piece. You read that right. The Beeker has the best head-to-head record of anyone in Makuuchi against the Yokozuna, even if that is just one kimboshi from last May when Hakuho was in an unprecedented surumpu. The Beeker drove right into the Yokozuna, but it wasn’t enough to finish him off. Hak slipped to the left and launched an over-arm throw sending Beeker to the ground. Hakuho improves to 6-1 while Toyohibiki falls to 0-7.
Enough of Day 7 Action. Daly’s got the ole goat on hump day!