Back from the grave thriller style though I know its not quite the right month, its everybody’s favorite spicy piece of filth: de Gama! Sky rockets are in flight today as I am about to serve you some Afternoon Delight. Its what I do… do you want a scone and some tea. That’s right you do, you old bird. Why don’t you just take this sausage [roll] and this god damn Americano. Anyways I digress, I started off this morning feeling so polite until after I showered where I continued to rub sticks and stones together until the sparks ignite. I would say that the thought of rubbing you is getting me so excited, however to be perfectly fair we all know the only person I thought of rubbing was in fact myself. So without further ado lemme get that chili oil because this rubbing is about to get real spicy!
Shotenro vs. Gagamaru
Not much to say about this bout … Both rikishi went into the bout with the same strategy it seemed: rush at the opponent and push them back. Lord Giggly had more strength and pushed out better. When Shotenro came back in, Giggledorf got his hand behind Tenro’s head and lowered him to the floor.
Osunaarashi vs. Fujiazuma
If I’m not mistaken, first time makuuchi rikishi, Osunaarashi not doing so hot at 3-4. He probably needs some of this chili oil I got to lubricate the pounding he could be receiving if he doesn’t get his score up. He fared pretty well against Fuji though. He went in for a big push at tachiai, but completely failed as Fuji kept his lateral motion. This forced the Egyptian back to the bails and after a few slick dances steps the Egyptian manages to find himself in the center of the dohyo. Sand Storm grabs Fuji’s belt and decides to do the classic hump and thrust (yorikiri) and eventually overpowers Fuji.
Kyokushuho vs. Tamawashi
Nice easy win by Tamawashi. From the beginning Tama placed pressure on the side of Kyoku’s body and pushed him back and out.
Toyohibiki vs. Tokushoryu
Pathetic ballerina style henka by Tokushoryu to gain the win.
Chiyotairyu vs. Jokoryu
Damn good bout … Chiyotairyu showing off his prowess by arm thrusting Joker’s neck then letting off for a second and going at it again. Joker tried to deflect Chiyo’s arms but he was to powerful. Chiyo drives Joker all the way to the edge and out.
Masunoyama vs. Ikioi
Masunoyama throws the tsuppari and Ikioi sees it and moves to the side. While doing this he tries to take Masu down by the head. However, it doesn’t work and Ikioi just plops on the ground. Weird but ok..
Kitataiki vs. Kaisei
Kaisei completely dominates Kita with forward arm thrusts. Kitataiki just seemed unprepared for it. Within seconds Kita is out of the ring
Myogiryu vs. Kyokutenho
Like Chiyotairyu, Myogiryu starts off with a arm thrust to the neck which Kyoku locks. Having the arm locked Kyoku tries to the side tackle Myogi. Doing this Kyoku conceded momentum and Myogi drives Kyoku all the way back to the edge and that’s all she wrote.
Kisenosato vs. Goeido
At the tachiai Goeido gets a good belt grip while Kisenosato only gets the armpit. Kise says fuck that and tries to brute strength Goeido back. Goeido gives in a little but quickly sets Kise up for a side throw by moving his hand to the back of Kise’s neck. Kise drops to the floor and emerges from the floor with a sweet look of disappointment.
Takayasu vs. Kakuryu
Taka looking to take down the Ozeki fires into tsuppari mode to fend off Kak’s attempts for a belt grip. But, Kak quickly thrusts Taka up by the neck hard. Then Kak pushes Taka to the side. With Taka’s back facing him, Kak moves in for the kill and pushes him away. This didn’t quite work and gave Taka enough time to recover. Taka immediately tsupparis again and Kak follows suit. After a few moments Kak gains the advantage and pulls Taka down.
Hakuho vs. Takekaze
Is it me or was Hakuho over aggressive this bout? I can probably count 4 possible harite attempts with 2 possible connections. Hakuho, buddy, he is only Takekaze… he already knows his place… on the ground. Regardless at tachiai Hakuho goes low and pushes out. Takekaze straightens up and Hakuho whacks him in the face. Hakuho then again goes in low and pushes him out. Take tries to get an underarm grip in order to bear hug battle. The battle happens but Haku towers over Take and because of this tries to push him down to the floor. At this point Take is only defending the onslaught and after several arm thrusts back and a few possible harite Take is out of the ring.
Homasho vs. Harumafuji
Pretty straight forward bout. Haruma pushes Homasho about… eventually gains an advantage from the side. He applies pressure on that side while they dance around the ring. Homasho crumbles eventually.
Sorry for the pretty short report but sadly that’s all it takes for a Spaniard of my caliber to blast off. I don’t know who is going to be next but something tells me Creswell will be coming in my rear.