Gents and Ladies, Butterballs and Meat-slabs, welcome to Day 9 of the Osaka tournament. Goldstein here, back again to bring you due coverage like a warm mawashi. Our two Yokozunae lead the pack with Ozeki Kakuryuu and M11 Oosunaarashi one behind the game. Endou is batting .500, and Kotooshuu is all kinds of not-even-trying.
Yeah, I’m slow on the pick-up today. I want to do something in honor of my first coverage of an Osaka tournament, but I’ve yet to visit the place. Or comprehend the dialect. And that’s got me thinking. Whenever a Kansai dialect is dubbed over into English, they turn it into a Brooklyn accent or a Southern accent. I’m not entirely sure why. But as I’m a Texas boy, I think I’ll settle on the latter. Continue reading
Greetings. As any of you who have lived in Japan know, this is the busy season. The fiscal year is winding down, co-workers are getting transferred and new ones are coming in, and there are a plethora of farewell and welcome parties to attend. Needless to say, this has one hell of an effect on the way things are run here at S&S. As it appears, ol’ Creswell is holding down the fort all by his lonesome for the time being. So ya’ll’re gonna have to deal with it. Let’s dive into day 1 and 2. Continue reading
I was going to write “Haru (spring) Basho” for the headline here, but I don’t have much reason to. Up here in the frozen north of Akita (especially in my neck of the woods), things are still as cold an snowy as ever. Spring is the time of new beginnings, and although the weather ain’t doing anything new, there are some interesting things going on in sumo. Hakuho, Harumafuji, Kakuryu, Kisenosato (maybe), and of course the golden boy of the Japanese media… Endo. Continue reading
Here I am again for day 12. Although this basho was Hakuho’s first negative day yusho, there has been some decent stuff going on. It seems that two goons have been hired to toss Kotooshu out of the ozeki saloon by the scruff of his neck on to the dusty road permanently; the era of the euro-zeki flung out after him, flopping down on his head like a cheap dress (or is Freakanomics going to prove right again?). It seems that Endo and the Pharaoh have reached a basic level of competence in makuuchi. Kisenosato has gotten more egg on his face than an ovaraptor, and Kyokutenho is still about to hang in at 39. Here are today’s highlight bouts. Continue reading
First off, apologies for the limited coverage from us this basho. After 2 basho of me, Connolly and Goldstein scrambling to report on 15 days, we decided we needed to cut back. Skeleton crew means fewer reports, but we’ll be there where it counts. At least until Montana, Daly, DeGama, Berturm, Valentine, Chalmers, and Johnson can get their petty personal lives sorted and get back to what’s really important in life… no, not kids, or jobs, or small businesses… not hectic work schedules, nor higher education, nor sleep, nor spouses, nor important paperwork… but the most important thing to any REAL man. Reporting on sumo. Speaking of which here’s day 10. Continue reading
It’s a night of wrestling. And drama. Wrestlama. They should come up with a better name for that.
Good evening, folks. Goldstein here, introducing tonight’s main event.
They had their eyes on each other. Two star-crossed heavy men in diapers on a date with destiny. One, the big boy in the sumo equivalent of the scandalous red dress (leaving nothing up top to the imagination!), an ozeki with designs on the top spot. He knew he had what it takes to win; he had the crowd on his side. But his wily opponent… if Big Red let his guard down for just a moment, it could be all over. That opponent, that dashingly ugly upstart in his baby blues—he could taste the glory, if only he could get the right grip. He’s done it before. Does he have another miracle in him? The wind carries a whisper of his future; it says, “Kisenosatoooo.” All eyes are on them. Their intense but brief encounter would play out before millions—okay, let’s be honest, thousands—of eager eyes, four judges, and a noisy referee. It all plays out in the ring. The crowd is mildly excited. The moment of truth nears.
Stay tuned for tonight’s episode: Dohyo Really Love Me? Continue reading
Thankless jobs: janitors, garbage men, hookers, and reporting on Sumo & Stogies. I had a rough work week and really wanted to go to the bar tonite and toss back a few relaxed pints with some buddies. However, S&S is a cruel mistress. I got home from work at 10:00 and i’ve got this report plus our betting sheets for tomorrow, plus 2 work reports to get wrapped up, and I got a 9:00 call tomorrow morning. So I apologize if I didn’t cover every facet of every bout. If you want to blame someone, blame Daly, Valentine, Briton-Meyer, Chalmers, and Montana for having families.
That aside we go in to today with a slightly interesting situation developing. Kise is at 10-2. Hakuho and Harumafuji are at 12-0. Kise has got Haruma today, and Hakuho tomorrow. If he beats Haruma today, and Hakuho wins, then Kise beats Hakuho tomorrow, and Haruma wins tomorrow, they will be tied going into senshuraku. Which is good for tension. However, if Haruma loses today and tomorrow, and Hakuho wins both, then Hakuho gets his 29th yusho. Conversely if Hakuho loses to Kakuryu and Kise and Haruma beats both of them, then Harry will get his 6th yusho. We’ll see how it goes. Continue reading